You Can Always Get Another Husband, Baby, Pet, Job… This is perhaps one of the cruelest myths – that somehow you can ‘replace’ the beloved person or thing whose loss is breaking your heart. It’s a myth that tends to be entirely socially perpetrated, rather than originating from grievers themselves who know in their […]
Myths of Grief Recovery #3 – You Will Get Over Your Loss & Be Your ‘Old Self’ Again
You Can’t Step Into The Same River Twice – Heraclitus Grieving people often look at me with worried expressions and ask, “When will I be my old self again”. This is particularly the case if their grief has been going on for more than a couple of months. Grievers sometimes believe that according […]
DEATH, GRIEF & RITUAL: COMMEMORATING MY MOTHER
By Ellen Gould-Ventura I feel great pleasure and gratitude to be able to present this guest Blog post by musician Ellen Gould-Ventura. Ellen was unable to be with her mother, Hetty Ventura, at the time of her death in 2002. But Ellen brought her mother’s ashes home, and created a unique and beautiful ritual involving her young children […]
Myths of Grief Recovery #2 – Don’t Feel Bad
Don’t feel bad = Don’t feel what you are feeling – A Cautionary Tale This article is the second in a series of posts that look at popular myths of grief recovery. Myth #1 looked at the erroneous but widespread notion that ‘time heals all wounds’. Today’s post examines the myth that you shouldn’t or don’t have to […]
Myths of Grief Recovery #1 – Time Heals All Wounds
Time doesn’t heal all wounds;- it just passes. It’s what you do with time that makes the difference in healing from grief! I often hear from people in the early stages of grief – i.e. less than a year – who express fear that their grief is not resolving. They are concerned that weeks […]
Chronic Grief Counseling – A Lifeline Back To Health and Happiness
Chronic grief is a serious road block to mental health and happiness. Read on to learn how counseling can help you regain your psychological well being if you are stuck in “the pain that won’t go away” There’s much debate in the research community about the usefulness of grief counseling. The debate revolves around […]
An Interview With Dr. Jenny Melamed – Addiction Medicine Woman
This post is an Interview I conducted with Vancouver BC addiction physician Jenny Melamed. Jenny is a great example of a progressive physician who works collaboratively with counselors like myself to help people recover from dependency on drugs and alcohol. Incorporated within the addiction medicine specialty are the processes of detoxification, rehabilitation, harm reduction, abstinence-based […]
Re-Membering Ab – My True Friend
It’s been almost seven years since a friend of mine called from India to tell me my friend Ab had died in his sleep on February 20, 2004. Seven years – blink. Time accelerates as you get older! It’s strange how I knew the content of this message even before it was delivered, and braced […]
Valentines Day – Remembering Daddy
Valentines can be a bitter sweet day as we remember loved ones who have died and special times in our lives that will never be again. My Valentine’s post is by guest author Alicia King. Alicia has written a loving and tender tribute to her relationship with her father, reminding those who are grieving that love has […]
Grief Counseling – Who Needs It?
There’s much debate in the academic research community regarding the usefulness of grief counseling. The debate seems torevolve around whether grief counseling is necessary for recovery, or if it even does any good. There seems to be some agreement that for ‘normal’ grief, counseling isn’trequired for healing to take place. Healing tends to happen on […]